Three Presents
We celebrate a secular Christmas. This year, we agreed with our adult friends and relatives not to exchange gifts. We would only give gifts to the children. This seems better than putting each other on the spot to pick something thoughtful, and risking hard feelings, pretending to be thrilled, and making returns, or else exchanging gift cards that essentially cancel each other out.
Despite this brilliant plan, my wife Kathryn gave me three gifts that I am truly thankful for, only one of which I hinted about wanting. To be sure, we give each other presents all the time, not waiting for special occasions. They are often items of clothing or things for the house, and quite mundane. But this year, three presents are special, and worth writing about.
CMY Cube
The CMY cube is a simple Platonic solid with no moving parts. Its opposing transparent faces are colored cyan, magenta, and yellow, respectively. As you hold it and turn it, it shows how the colors mix, depend on the ambient light, and affect the color of what you are looking at through it. I find this object delightful, like a completely deterministic kaleidoscope.
Shoe ZAP
Like, perhaps, a majority of America adults, I have toenail fungus. It doesn’t bother me much, but it deeply disturbs my wife. We have tried treating it with herb oils and pharmaceutical pastes. We have used a Dremel to grind my nails down to the quick. The Shoe ZAP uses UV light to sanitize my shoes and slippers after each wearing. If I have been re-exposing my toes to spores that made their way through my socks, this should help. We will see.
Formal Bib
Another of my subtle faults that my wife invariably discerns is my sloppy eating, exacerbated by our practice of eating many meals on our reclining couch while we watch television. After she joked that I needed a bib, and I went along with the joke, as recommended by teachers of improvisational comedy and marriage counselors in general, she gave me one. It is made of washable vinyl, and styled to look like a tuxedo. She got one for herself that looks like a black formal dress with pearls. I wear mine at almost every meal.
