The Ballad of Apo-B

There’s a new player in the cholesterol game, called Apolipoprotein-B. Of course, you will not hear the story in this way from your doctor.

Around the time that I was born
Scientists began to warn
Of a molecule called
Cholesterol

The body makes it in the liver
So that organ can deliver
All that’s necessary
For a good cell wall

It’s a name that seems insipid
For an entire class of lipid
But soon became the
Biggest risk of all

Too much total? Best be wary
Of a coming coronary.
How low must it be
to feel secure?

That’s a number that keeps shrinking
As new data and new thinking
Teach us that average
Ain’t, for sure.

Soon we heard that different densities
Have contrasting propensities.
Raise the ratio of HDL to
LDL to cure!

But VLDL soon appeared
Triglycerides became much feared
Quacks wrote books denying
The whole narrative

Statin drugs can lower the number
But their side-effects can make you dumber
And they don’t make infarctions
Less imperative

No pill works for easy rapid
Lowering of total lipid
Perfect diet is modestly
Reparative

Apo-B and his evil twin
Apo-A are now the “in”
Correlatives
Of heart disease

A’s not good and B is bad
Until more data can be had
That makes it through the noise
Of research studies

This is the ballad of Apo-B
Just does what it mean to me?
If I eat WFPB
I don’t have to worry about CAD